I like daft. I like silly. Always did and always will. However using humour became my coping mechanism of choice and my way of functioning especially when I lost my husband Justin. I was 34 at this time. He was on a bike ride, just past our home with our children who were 10 and 11. They cycled up the hill and that was that, our lives changed forever.
He was the love of my life, the gnome to my toadstool. I will spare you the very sad events that obviously followed. As awful as that day was, I consciously made the choice a few hours later to not let this devastating event wreck my children, I was not going to let sadness define them. I decided to be honest and open from the start. It was extra tricky in our house because I was meant to die first from my brain tumour. Which obviously hasnt happened because here I am writing to myself and hopefully a few others.
Fast forward a number of years, many tears and smiles later, Justin now watches over us from above and now David carries the baton for our family. I have been very blessed to love and have been loved twice.
The reason I have posted this blog is, with Christmas looming, emotions are hightened. Mine were all over the place the Christmas after Justin died. I was fiercely grieving, but it was the loneliness that was all consuming. On Boxing day, after my dad had left to go home, I sat with my laptop and a bottle of bubbles (bloody lethal combination) looking at blah blah online. I came to the conclusion that much later down the line I would need to allow room for two gnomes in my life, (fun fact, one lunch date was with an actual dwarf but thats for another day).
Life is frighteninly short, seize that moment and find your gnome. If life has pooped on you, find that second gnome. Failing that, sod the gnomes, drink gin ! That said really, really try and never give up on the chance to be “your kind of happy”. Its desperatly easy to cave in, but its oh so much more fabulous to try and give happiness a real bash. I’m not saying we all need to be with someone to be happy, however my ‘happy’ comes in the form of working as a team, partnership, marriage. So I made a choice to be happy again and poor David was the chosen one.
Before I go, I thought I’d tell you about Reg and Elsie, our happy gnome couple, who are currently residing in my living room. David and I were visiting his folks up North last weekend, like literally the Scottish borders kinda North. God help me, my Southern umblicial cord was twanging like a toddler force fed on steriods! I digress, I was a canny lass (see I can speak Northumberlandish ) and found these THREE FOOT gnomes north of Newcastle on Ebay, so after a slight detour from our journey to the folks of the North, we picked up these bad boys. Yes we did indeed recieve many many funny looks driving across the country! Some not in a good way at all!
I blame my parents, I usually do for most things! However they instilled this daft bloody gnome love problem I have aquired. So to have found these hoooge ones is a cracker of a result! Happy Christmas parents ha ha ha!
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. Our lives are so busy, so it really means a great deal. I hope its makes you smile and maybe gives you a nudge, if a nudge is needed, to go and find what makes you “your kind of happy”. To me thats the spirit of this season… Happiness…..lets sprinkle it everywhere, alongside confetti and unicorn rainbow farts! It would be great if you wanted to leave a comment. Then I wouldnt have to send Reg round to beat you up! 😉
Lots of love